Jokes: Contacts.

    A highway patrolman flags down a car that's weaving from lane to lane.
"License & registration, please, " the cop barks through the window. The driver hands them over.
     "Look," says the cop, brandishing the papers. "It says here plain as day that you should be wearing glasses. "
     As he begins writing a ticket the driver blurts out, "But I have contacts!" The cop replies,  "I don't care who you know,  you are still getting a ticket. "
~Piri Avandson~